Reflections on Lovingkindness Day 2 of 10: Do you complain about your child?
Do you ever stop to think about how your child is here to benefit you? What are the qualities that s/he brings to your life that you otherwise would not experience? How is your life enriched by having a child?
In my experience, though parents dearly love their children, they are also frustrated, fed-up, and exhausted, which leads to complaining, blaming, ungratefulness, indifference, being triggered, yelling, and nagging.
Here’s my takeaway from Sharon’s Day 2 Meditation:
Child as the Benefactor
Day two of the lovingkindness meditation is about sending loving-kindness to a benefactor who is someone who has positively impacted your life. Someone who has loved you unconditionally and supported you beyond any expectations.
As I was doing my meditation, a dear friend came to my mind who I know will always be there for me no matter what. As I repeated my phrases of lovingkindness and energetically sent them to him, my body was filled with deep gratitude.
I was also thinking about you and your child and how it would be if all parents would see their child as their benefactor and emanate a deep sense of gratitude towards the child...
We primarily focus on the child’s negative behavior versus the unique person with exceptional personalities, interests, and quirks.
What would open up for you as a parent if you saw through all the behavioral challenges deeply into your child and genuinely connected with the gifts that s/he is bringing to you?
When our ways of BEing and mindset are negative, when we expect the worst, are judgmental and critical, this is what WE create.
"As a source and creator of our own lives, we are fully responsible for how we live our lives. Despite the circumstances, the choice is yours whether you live with anger, hurt and resentment in your heart OR peace, love, gratitude and compassion."
Perhaps this question sounds harsh to some of you, but I want to be radically honest and take a stand for your empowerment which is why I am inviting you to reflect on:
Why would you keep complaining about your child when s/he is something that you brought forth to this world, to begin with?
It is just like lighting a candle and then putting your finger on it, complaining it burns!
I also want to acknowledge how hard parenting is and that you do get to vent; however, consistently living with that negative mindset of complaining and blaming does not serve you or your child in any way.
I believe that one of the most significant responsibilities in this world is to bring a child into it and raise him so that he can become a compassionate, peaceful, caring, and selfless citizen of this world.
It is my mission to support parents in that...
May You BE Safe, BE Healthy, BE Happy and Live with Ease,
Paula
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